What are the characteristics of gay women

Queer knows that (6) : Do gay women despise?

I often hear explicitly disparaging things about women from the mouths of gay men. Hence the question: Do gay women despise them? - Marie, Schöneberg

When it comes to relationships with women, the same applies to gay men as to all men - there are some. First of all, the intimate side of the relationship: Many gays adore women. Our biggest icons are not other gay men, but Madonna, Barbra Streisand or Lady Gaga, to name a few. We make pilgrimages to their concerts or their films and dedicate our own parties to them.

The veneration does not necessarily have to do with the fact that these artists stand up for gay rights. Rather, they are fascinated by the size of the performance, flamboyance, playing with gender roles and sexuality. They are the divas that many of us would like to be.

Many gays are likely to have more women in their circle of friends than straight men

Some gay men travel as trannies, other gays work as creators of fashion for women. In the less dazzling everyday life there are likely to be many who have significantly more women than straight men in their circle of friends. And no, these friendships are not necessarily based on a common interest in clothes and the exchange of relationship tips, as the cliché would have it. A basis may also be that the buddy world of straight men seems strange and closed to both women and gays.

For women who almost only have gay friends, homos have also invented terms such as “gay mum” or “Gabi”. They are not only meant ironically, but have an insulting undertone - a first sign of the ambivalences in the relationship between gay men and women.

Other gay men also marginalize lesbians

So other gay men don't care about women. They have nothing against them, but they are also not interested in them - and also sideline lesbians, whose concerns they ignore. After all, there are those gays who actually set themselves apart from women, whom one can speak of misogyny. One reason for this: They fear that they will not be seen as a whole guy by the majority society because of their gayness and therefore lose their privileges as a man. They devalue women in order to underline their masculinity and to save their own privileges.

That's not smart. One cannot get rid of the supposed stigma of the “female gay” by devaluing women. Gay men should better show solidarity with women. Only where women are doing well will they do well too.

Episode 5: Are gay men happy when straight people go to their parties?

Episode 4: As a straight person, how do I reject gay flirts?

Episode 3: Do you play our roles?

Episode 2: Which of the Two Will Get Pregnant?

Episode 1: Would you rather be straight?

Do you also have a question for the Tagesspiegel homos? Write us an email at [email protected]!

This text first appeared in the printed Saturday supplementMore Berlin.

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